Notes on why Christian wives do not obey Christian husbands

wake up!
wake up!

Notes on why Christian wives do not obey Christian husbands.

This is a summary of some recent findings of the watchman. (See my other post on why this subject is being raised at the following link:

In a recent altar call by a show of hands of wives who obeyed their husbands, not one hand was raised. In a subsequent call for hands to be raised of husbands who loved their wives, only one hand was raised. This altar call was made on a regular Sunday service.

Why does such a sad state of marital relation exist in a regular evangelical church? No one, not even the elder who preached a sermon based on Colossians 3:18 and made that altar call that morning could answer. Only he wives and their husbands knew their respective answers. But no one is telling no one.

However, prior to hearing this report, the watchman already received the answer given by the Lord through another sister’s (not from that church) mouth. When asked by an exasperated closed one why, unlike others, she did not heed his teaching on how to listen to the Holy Spirit and be led by the Spirit, she merely said that he had no credibility in teaching her as she knew he did not exactly follow the Holy Spirit when it came to certain issues. So how could she know when to listen and when not to listen to his teaching? She thus chose to stay away when he taught.

For example, she said, “Your prayers are powerful and full of faith, but your actions in dealing with life matters do not reflect your faith in your prayers.” He still manifested some fear and anxiety over certain matters in life.

Alas, so said all the wordless wives who refused to raise their hands, preferring to give the silent but overt statement that they could not obey their husbands because they could not respect them in their private lives. Their husbands had not honored the Biblical commitments to love them more than their own lives. Their husbands did not deny selves, take up each own cross, and follow Christ. Their husbands had not obeyed God’s word. Their husbands had not been crucified and died with Jesus on the cross and were walking by flesh and not by the Spirit. Their husbands were not man of faith and could not please God. Their husbands were after the world and the worldly things. Their husbands’ minds were not the mind of Christ. Their husbands were not sons of God because sons of God are led by the Spirit of God and they were led by their own flesh or worse by evil spirits.Their husbands’ prayers were not answered as they disobeyed the word of God. For example,

Jesus said “If you abide in Me and My words abide in you, you will ask what you desire and it shall be done for you.” John 15:7 But their husbands had no desire to let God’s word abide in them.

“I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh,” Galatians 5:16 But their husbands were not even baptized in the Holy Spirit or aware of the reality of the transforming power of the Spirit of God.

Jesus was “declared to be the Son of God with power according to the Spirit of holiness, by the resurrection from the dead.” Romans 1:4 The husbands of those Christians women wanted the power of the Holy Spirit but without holiness.

Ephesians 2:2-3 described the sons of disobedience, the nature children of wrath, dead in trespasses and sins we once were. ‘In which you once walked according to the course of this world…among whom also we once conducted ourselves…fulfilling the desires of the flesh and of the mind…just as others.” It is quite easy for the wives to determine where their husbands are, by seeing whether they are still walking and conducting themselves according to the course of this world, fulfilling their own desires of the old selves.

In short, wives are disillusioned by the hypocrisy in their husbands. Jesus condemned hypocrisy. Wives do not submit to hypocrites. Jesus spoke very harsh words on such religious hypocrisy. He called them “the blind leading the blind,” “causing the little one to stumble”, or worse, not entering the kingdom of God and preventing others to enter!

Are the wives doing right in not obeying such hypocrites (who disobey God)? You answer.


5 thoughts on “Notes on why Christian wives do not obey Christian husbands

  1. God fearing men have trouble with submission from their wives. Men may do the dishes, mop the floor, and keep up the houseand cook all the meals as the wife goes off to work. Yet, if asked to cook a meal, the wife gets quiet. This breeds trouble. I know one husband who cooks all the meals, his wife has a bad attitude if asked to cook; she is continually sick and weak and full of pain. What is wrong? Could it be an attitude of stubbornness? Thehusband feel this well might b e the case. The view of the husband is to pray for his wife, as no words of encouraging her to obey seem to work. Scripture teaches, and he prays for the healing of his wife, that God will “have mercy on our trangressions” Found somewhere in Hebrews. That is the prayer of the husband for his wife’s healing. It seems that in all of these troubles, there is a great lesson to be learned, and that is, obedience may be better than sacrifice for the wife, and for the husband to cook and do the dishes as an act of live toward his wife. At that, ask the Lord to somehow brings both partners to a place of peace and to grow in theri understanding. Submitting one to another seems to be the course of a godly man, and ask the Lord to speak to the stubborn wife. Troubled waters, sickness, etc persist, but the cost of growing in Christ is costly. My prayers go with thsoe struggling with sumbission.


    • Thank you for commenting. Your comment has encouraged me to write further on this subject. Please read part 2 of this topic, posted today. Thank you. God bless you and your loved ones.


  2. Yes you are so right . I admit I’m that wife . I want my husband to lead me . We live like Christians during church and act like none believers the other days of the week I start feeling like its time to give are all he gets upset that in even ? His spiritual life totally ignores me tells me I need to be submissive to him but I say why and how when you don’t submit .


    • thank you for commenting. I am led to recommend the following web site which is rich in a great variety of Biblical teaching resources. Free audio teachings and articles. I pray that the Holy Spirit will guide you to find the right answer for your situations. Even your start pondering this matter and listening to some relevant and inspired Biblical teachings will bring you a step forward to receiving the Lord’s solutions and blessings already installed for you both in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus.
      contents: The Purpose Of Marriage Priorities For Women Marriage Relationship; Submission; Dating And Marriage; The Priority Of Marriage I The Priority Of Marriage II God’s Love In Marriage I; God’s Love In Marriage II Strife In Marriage Submission In Marriage; Sex In Marriage; Love And Respect In Marriage


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