Tag: healing mental illness

Grace Encounters: Five True Stories

AW grace encounter DVDGrace Encounters DVD

This package includes the Grace Encounters DVD—five stories of people who encountered grace in such an extraordinary way, their lives were changed forever. These stories include:

Two women with backgrounds of legalism and spiritual abuse were set free by the power of God.
A person walked away from a history of drug abuse through discovering how good God is.
A man in prison encountered God in a way that set him on a path to freedom and victory.
A couple who felt “unusable” by the Lord was so impacted by grace that it transformed them and sent them into the heart of Africa to set captives free.

This package will help you understand what the Bible says about God’s nature and love for you. Be inspired to have your own grace encounter with God.

https://store.awmi.net/p-873-grace-encounters-dvd.aspx

 

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One healed restored mind: emotive-cognitive behavioral functioning

jesus healed the mind
Jesus heals and restores sound mind

Many Christians find that not all who are suffering from challenges in their mind are healed from the symptoms and the causes thereof.
Why? This is a question that really bothers those who practice divine healing. Why do mental patients seem to find it harder to receive healing? Are there scriptural evidences that mental conditions that torment a person may be healed like that of physical conditions? If so, where are the evidences in the Bible? This is our topic today. Christianity is all about effective successful functioning living in the power of God and His words (life and spirit. John 6:63) for all who believe.

Let us read the following Bible verses (God’s words) with a heart that is opened to the Lord’s Spirit. Here is a brief summary of key positive healing words for all believers I find from the verses: They refer to our thought life and our own behavior. What we put in our heart and actually come out. Evidences of our inner lives that others can see.
One mind. Sympathize. Love. tenderhearted. humble attitude. bless and not curse or seek revenge. speak no evil (it also means do no evil. speaking is equivalent to doing). turn away from evil. do good. seek peace. work to maintain peace.
worship Christ as Lord of your life. Gentle, respectful, keep your conscience free. 

The two keys to living a powerful Kingdom of God life: Living the life in the Spirit, and the resurrection of Jesus Christ. 

1 Peter 3:8-22 (NLT)
All Christians
8 Finally, all of you should be of one mind. Sympathize with each other. Love each other as brothers and sisters.[a] Be tenderhearted, and keep a humble attitude. 9 Don’t repay evil for evil. Don’t retaliate with insults when people insult you. Instead, pay them back with a blessing. That is what God has called you to do, and he will grant you his blessing. 10 For the Scriptures say,

“If you want to enjoy life
and see many happy days,
keep your tongue from speaking evil
and your lips from telling lies.
11 Turn away from evil and do good.
Search for peace, and work to maintain it.
12 The eyes of the Lord watch over those who do right,
and his ears are open to their prayers.
But the Lord turns his face
against those who do evil.”[b]

Suffering for Doing Good
13 Now, who will want to harm you if you are eager to do good? 14 But even if you suffer for doing what is right, God will reward you for it. So don’t worry or be afraid of their threats.

15 Instead, you must worship Christ as Lord of your life. And if someone asks about your hope as a believer, always be ready to explain it. 16 But do this in a gentle and respectful way.[c] Keep your conscience clear. Then if people speak against you, they will be ashamed when they see what a good life you live because you belong to Christ.

17 Remember, it is better to suffer for doing good, if that is what God wants, than to suffer for doing wrong!

18 Christ suffered[d] for our sins once for all time. He never sinned, but he died for sinners to bring you safely home to God. He suffered physical death, but he was raised to life in the Spirit.[e]

19 So he went and preached to the spirits in prison— 20 those who disobeyed God long ago when God waited patiently while Noah was building his boat. Only eight people were saved from drowning in that terrible flood.[f] 21 And that water is a picture of baptism, which now saves you, not by removing dirt from your body, but as a response to God from[g] a clean conscience. It is effective because of the resurrection of Jesus Christ.

22 Now Christ has gone to heaven. He is seated in the place of honor next to God, and all the angels and authorities and powers accept his authority.

Footnotes:

3:8 Greek Show brotherly love.
3:10-12 Ps 34:12-16.
3:16 Some English translations put this sentence in verse 15.
3:18a Some manuscripts read died.
3:18b Or in spirit.
3:20 Greek saved through water.
3:21 Or as an appeal to God for.

Paul’s Prayer for Spiritual Wisdom
Ephesians 1:15 Ever since I first heard of your strong faith in the Lord Jesus and your love for God’s people everywhere,[e] 16 I have not stopped thanking God for you. I pray for you constantly, 17 asking God, the glorious Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, to give you spiritual wisdom[f] and insight so that you might grow in your knowledge of God. 18 I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the confident hope he has given to those he called—his holy people who are his rich and glorious inheritance.[g]

19 I also pray that you will understand the incredible greatness of God’s power for us who believe him. This is the same mighty power 20 that raised Christ from the dead and seated him in the place of honor at God’s right hand in the heavenly realms. 21 Now he is far above any ruler or authority or power or leader or anything else—not only in this world but also in the world to come. 22 God has put all things under the authority of Christ and has made him head over all things for the benefit of the church. 23 And the church is his body; it is made full and complete by Christ, who fills all things everywhere with himself.

Footnotes:

1:1 The most ancient manuscripts do not include in Ephesus.
1:6 Greek to us in the beloved.
1:11 Or we have become God’s inheritance.
1:13 Or he put his seal on you.
1:15 Some manuscripts read your faithfulness to the Lord Jesus and to God’s people everywhere.
1:17 Or to give you the Spirit of wisdom.
1:18 Or called, and the rich and glorious inheritance he has given to his holy people.

Practical application:
1. repeatedly listen to the Bible verses.
2. copy down the verses.
3. worship God.
4. keep mind under the control of the Holy Spirit and the resurrection power of Christ.
5. take Holy Communion.
6. use our mouth to proclaim God’s positive words.
7. keep our mind thinking of thoughts of God’s goodness.
8. As Paul has taught, keep praying in tongue.
9. fellowship with other Christians who practice these.
10. be baptized by the Holy Spirit and be filled with the Holy Spirit.

healed parenting

Parent_ScoldingThere is a sickness which is often ignored or neglected in treatment or seeking for treatment. Parent(s) with coercive control syndrome. Please seek treatment. You are hurting your child.

What is Coercive Control?
Maypole define it as an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten their victim
The Tactics include domestic violence: ‘violating physical integrity’, causing fear and physical harm
intimidation and humiliation: ‘denial of respect and autonomy’ using threats, surveillance (eg stalking), degradation (eg name calling), emotional withdrawal, destruction of possessions
isolation: undermining and deprivation of social contacts and support

control: of resources required for autonomous decision making and independence, including
deprivation of money and food
monitoring of time
restricted mobility and transportation
restricted access to communication

There is a longer list here, from The Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence.
(continue here: https://www.dhs.state.or.us/caf/documents/Parenting_in_the_Context_of_Coercive_Control.pdf)
Mother-Scolding-Daughter
Dear Dr. ,
I am the mother of three children, ages 10, 13, and 15. My question is how parents can help their children make and keep New Year’s resolutions and goals. Also, how do we help keep our children accountable throughout the year, especially when we see our own resolutions slipping?
Regards,
V.
Dear V:
When we “help” children do anything good, . . . this is a function of “influence.” There are three fundamental ways of influencing others:
Coercion motivates by Fear. Others will conform to coercive influence out of fear for the harsh consequences that will come crashing upon them. Conformity means that a person will at least try to “look like” they are doing what is desired; but those oppressed by coercive influence rarely put their whole heart into a task.

Modes of Coercion: Control, Intimidation, Threat, Demand, Manipulation, Bullying, Criticizing, Rage, Anger, Revenge, Guilt.
Coercive Influence is Temporary & Reactive. The “apparent” desired behavior only happens as long as a fear-producing threat is present.

* * * * * * *
Cooperation motivates by Fairness. Others will do what you want them to do . . . because a cooperative contract is in place: You do this for me, . . . and I’ll do this for you. In latin the idea is expressed as Quid Pro Quo, . . .”something for something.”

Modes of Cooperation: Exchange, Dicker, Deal, Trade, Barter, Contract, Negotiate, and Compromise.

Cooperative Influence is Functional & Reactive. The exchange is pragmatic and mutually beneficial, but the desired behavior only happens as long as a payoff is in place.

* * * * * * *
Compassion motivates through Honor. Others will do what they do, . . . because they honor you — honor that is freely chosen and proactively initiated, it is neither coerced or purchased by a bargain.
Modes of Compassion: Inviting, Accepting, Acknowledging, Respectful, Patient, Kind, Gentle, Loving, Space-Giving, and Open to Creative Possibilities.

Compassionate Influence is Sustained & Proactive. Desired behavior endures beyond moments of direct influence, because those who feel compassionate influence do what they do from heart-felt independence; the experience of loving influence inspires others to live with honor.
* * * * * * *

Obviously, if parents will influence their children optimally in setting and getting good goals, . . . they will do it through compassionate influence, . . . only then will the children do what they do because they own it, . . . and they feel it. This is the way of Honor.

The setting and getting of all good goals stands upon the foundation of a person’s integrity of character. Parents can best instill integrity in their children as they demonstrate that compassionate pattern by example. Parents must “live” the same pattern and principles to which they invite their children.

The “goal” of higher character is a foundational one. When high character is firmly in place, productive goal setting and goal getting naturally flows therefrom.

In the end, you can’t MAKE your children behave, because “good behavior” comes from the heart, and you can’t FORCE the motivations of the heart. Parents may be able to COERCE compliant behavior on the outside, . . . but COERCION cannot cause children to obey on the inside! In the end, parents should encourage and invite “obedient behavior” . . . and not merely “compliant behavior” in their children.
The choices are these: You can be a
Sheepherder or a Shepherd.
Two approaches that parallel
Coercive Influence vs. Compassionate Influence:

The Sheepherder uses Coercive approaches. The Sheepherder drives the sheep from behind with sticks of punishment, and harsh verbal commands. The sheep “comply” because they fear the wrath of the sheepherder. The Sheepherder is compulsive and reactive; the sheepherder reacts on impulses of emotion. The sheepherder flies off the handle and dreams up punishments “on the spot” in the heat of anger . . . AS a child’s bad behavior appears. The sheep eventually learn to fear, avoid, and inwardly hate the sheepherder.

The DOWN side of being a Coercive Sheepherder is this: Children will only comply with the “speed limit” while the cop is on the highway . . . and when the cop leaves . . . the children will go any “speed” they want, and act in undisciplined ways, . . . for they have not been taught the law . . . or been shown the “living law” by example.

The Shepherd uses Compassionate approaches. The Shepherd leads the sheep from the front. The Shepherd sets an example of how the sheep should behave from the heart. The Shepherd teaches the sheep the law by which the flock will be governed, and also teaches the attached consequences (as opposed to punishments) that will occur if the law is not obeyed. The sheep learn to love the shepherd, because the shepherd loves them.
The Shepherd is fair and always acts within laws that are clearly established & explained BEFORE a child’s bad behavior appears.

The UP side of being a Compassionate Shepherd is this: There is no need for policing the “speed limit,” . . . for the children have been taught the law and know the value of living with honor; further they “honor” the shepherd because the shepherd loves and trusts them. They know that the shepherd loves them because they see the “living law” in the way they are treated.

To be Shepherds to their children, Mom and Dad need to get on the same page as to the “laws of family,” . . . fair laws that are established for the benefit of the children, . . . peace of mind for the parents, . . . and the order of the household.

Establishing “Family Laws” in a Family Council

When Mom and Dad are on the same page (literally, . . . a page of written expectations, duties, tasks, etc.), then Mom & Dad assemble a family meeting. In the family meeting, instead of “laying down the law” . . . the children are asked for their input on this question:

What can we all do to have a happy, orderly, and peaceful home?

In the family meeting, Mom & Dad discuss with their children the expectations on school homework, times for play, chores to be done, rules of the household, etc. And to help the children see why they need to be contributors to the order of the household, parents might ask these questions:

Who will pay for the food we eat? Who will prepare the food we eat? Who will pay for the roof over our heads? Who will clean the house that we live in?

That Mom & Dad work hard to be providers should NOT be taken for granted by the children. Because the children benefit from food and shelter, they need to be helpful contributors to the orderly & peaceful functioning of the home.

The reason why parents should ask children for their input is guided by a principle:
That which children help create,
they will support.

If Mom & Dad simply “lay down the law,” the children will always perceive that “law” . . . as “Mom & Dad’s law.” In contrast, when children have input and influence on the laws of the household, they will tend to see the governing structure as “The Family Law.” Thus, they will view it as THEIR LAW. they will have ownership of it . . . because they helped create it!

As for “accountability,” when expectations, chores, duties, etc., are agreed upon . . . THEN parents ask their children:

What should be a consequence
IF someone fails to follow through with the family laws?

Within Parent-Child relationships, the most effective consequences are not merely punitive, i.e., going to jail, getting flogged, or being put in “the stocks.” Instead, the best consequences are ones that are mutually agreed upon in a Family Council, and are naturally connected to the behavior that went against “Family Law.”

For example, if a bed is not made in the morning, a connected consequence may be . . . to “make the bed.” But not just that person’s bed, . . . a negotiation can be agreed to . . . that the violator of “bed making” receives the consequence of making everyone’s bed the next morning? When consequences are harder to do . . . than simply following the law in the first place, . . . then those consequences will be an effective learning experience that teach and reinforce obeying the Law from the start.

If parents have deeply ingrained “sheepherder” tendencies . . . then . . . it is a most wise for them to consider “Changing Their Stripes.” For if they don’t change, . . . such parents will “pass on” their unhappy legacy of coercive influence to the next generation.

Becoming the kind of parents that children will love, respect, and honor . . . is an influence that will be felt for decades to come.

When it comes to goal setting . . . beginning with the best goals is essential:

In setting goals, one must realize that not all goals are worth getting. To arrive at the best destination . . . one must begin the journey by moving the correct direction. This idea is addressed in my book:

Beginning Right: Good Questions, Good Answers. To arrive at good answers, we must first ask good questions! When we start with bad questions, we begin wrong . . . and thus, we will most likely end wrong. Asking unsound questions leads to second-class solutions. When our premise is poor, it’s hard to acquire the prize. But the truth is . . . we would not be asking a bad question, if we knew it was bad to begin with, . . . right? The saying goes:

It’s not what you don’t know that makes you a fool;
but what you “think” you know, . . . that ain’t so!

Beginning with a bad assumption is like climbing a ladder leaning against the wrong wall . . . It leads to “progress” . . . that ain’t progress at all! So, to begin right, it is wise to question the question, . . . thoroughly double-checking assumptions before launching into an avenue of inquiry. But how do you know when you’ve got a good question? (Changing Your Stripes, page 157)

Just as entertaining bad questions is a waste of time and energy, setting bad goals is equally unfruitful. When it comes to goal setting for children and young adults, they are especially vulnerable to beginning wrong . . . because they sometimes assume that the “bad examples” in their circle of influence are doing what should be done; and so they follow ill-advised trends and traditions and get their goals from unstable sources.

Every good goal must be weighed against the standards of integrity. An excerpt from my book speaks of the “social pull” to pursue the popular and appealing way, . . . instead of the compassionate and fulfilling way:

(continue here: http://www.calldrmatt.com/Parenting.htm)